What if Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings existed in the same universe?

It’s not that hard to imagine. They are both epic fantasies, set in Medieval-ish times with scruffy lords in armour and fair maidens being bad-ass and Sean Beans being Sean Bean. Shipping characters from Middle Earth off to Westeros (and vice versa) is a very plausible idea, indeed.

Anyhoo, I have a friend who could easily pass off as my identical twin, entertainment-wise. During our casual conversations, we make wayyy too many references to our favourite film and TV franchises than it is healthy to. It was during one such worryingly-odd conversation (by sanity’s standards) that Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings crossed paths.

Which sparked the ultimate question (the Oracle would be pleased): Just what might one encounter in a J.R.R. Tolkien/ G.R.R. Martin-blended world?

Here are some possibilities.

Dracarys, Smaug!

Daenerys Targaryen is the Mother of Dragons. Smaug is a dragon.

Suffice it to say that in Westeros-meets-Middle-Earth, our favourite Mother of Dragons would have not three, but four dragons. The fourth one being Smaug, of course. And Smaug might just teach the other three to talk.

Naturally, that oh-so-low, swoon-worthy Cumberbatch voice would refer to Emilia Clarke as “mother”. While the idea of that seems terribly odd, this is Game of Thrones; family relations are always odd (wink, the loving Lannister twins).

The tragic deaths of Sean Bean

We all know that Sean Bean dies in (almost) every movie. Needless to say, an actor who has that much experience with death scenes tends to go off in style (or in memorable fashion). That’s exactly what we’d get from Sean Bean in GoT-meets-LOTR: Two tragic deaths.

Boromir, son of the Steward of Gondor, attempts to harm Frodo while under the influence of the One Ring. He then fights to the death to protect Merry and Pippin, dying in typical Sean Bean-style before he can redeem his true noble image to Frodo.

His time as the Steward’s heir done, Sean Bean is later reborn as Warden of the North. To protect his then-Joffrey-lovin’ teen daughter, Eddard Stark voluntarily shames himself (undeservedly) right before his death. He ends up being written off (pun intended) as a traitor, and off with his head.

As Cersei Lannister so lovingly taught us, “When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die.” It’s a world where Sean Bean never wins.

Gandalf vs Melisandre

Of course, we’d have a showdown between Gandalf the White and The Red Woman, Melisandre!

Just as Gandalf battled the Balrog, we would see Gandalf and Melisandre tossing spells at each other at the Bridge of Khazad-dûm.

You shall not pass, Melisandre!

And just as Gandalf said to the Balrog, he’d say to Melisandre, “The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udûn. Go back to the Shadow!”

Yes, Melisandre, enjoy the Shadow. For the night is dark and full of terrors.

Thranduil Targaryen

Our tall, gorgeous King of Mirkwood has that long, light blonde/golden hair that instantly screams one word: Targaryen.

In fact, in our blended world, Thranduil could easily be the alter ego of one Rhaegar Targaryen. They bare an uncanny physical resemblance to one another and are, of course, both royalty.

Admittedly, Thranduil’s crown does look a tad bit Baratheon-esque (inspired by stag’s horns/nature and all), but it’s nothing a change in accessories can’t correct.

Saruman the White Walker

They do kinda look alike.

Instead of his Orcs and Uruk-hai, Saruman the White would lead the Frozen Walking Dead. He’d have to make do.

At least white would still be his colour!

Needle Stings!

Arya Stark’s “Needle” and Bilbo Baggins’ “Sting”.

There would be plenty of aptly-named uniquely-crafted swords for the not-vertically-advantaged courageous few.

Put these two weapons together, and you wouldn’t want them to prick you! Their names modestly describe what the sensation would feel like.

Sam Tarly-Gamgee

Samwell, Samwise, Tarly, Gamgee, po-tay-to, po-tah-to…

They are both loyal companions, they are both kinda built the same… the two Sams are practically cross-franchise counterparts. Good to know Tolkien/Martin Land would have a nice supply of worthy friends.